Monday, June 25, 2007

610 WIP: America's Most Introspective Sports Radio Station

I have been addicted to sports radio ever since I have been a pre-teen. I wish I knew why this was, since sports radio is arguably the lowest form of human communication. I've spent hours driving in my car listen to an overweight failed sportswriter get into arguments with stimulant-addicted unemployables about Peyton Manning's legacy.

I guess I do this for the sublime moments in sports radio, such as when a caller opined on the Kobe Bryant rape allegation: "You know, sometimes when you're with a girl you just can't say no anymore, like you're past the point of no return and she wants you to stop but you just can't" only to have the host agree with his statement until after a commercial break when he came back and "clarified" his remarks. Or who in the WFAN radio market does not enjoy it when Jerone from Manhattan calls up and talks about his mother's dialysis treatments?

But this weekend, I heard the greatest conversation in sports radio history.

The WIP 610 weekend overnight show hosted by Paul "Jolly" Jolowitz is usually a night of drunks and scoial reprobates calling to yell about Phillies manager Charlie Manuel while host Paul Jolowitz argues with them with the skill of the "alternate" of a failing public high school's debate team. It's a lot like an episode of the Real World -- it's amsuing for a few minutes, then it gets depressing, and then you have to stop caring before you think about investing in a cyanide pill.

In his pre-amble on Saturday night, Jolly told the audience that he did not want to discuss sports this night. Instead, he asked his audience to answer the question "Who fascinates you the most in this world?" Jolly said the audience could also guess who HIS was, since it was someone they probably would not expect.

The first caller calls up and is asked to guess Jolly's most fascinating person. He asks for a hint. Jolly tells him he is successful in all walks of life, but most notably business. The caller immediately answers "Warren Buffett." Jolly pauses. "The first caller got it right. That NEVER happens. But isn't Warren Buffett fascinating? He's the second richest man in the country!"

Another caller said that he thought that Bono was the most fascinating person in the world, because he'll have a concert and u2 will be done playing a song and then he'll stop to talk to the audience about African debt relief. They chatted about that for a while and then Jolly asked the caller how fascinating he thought Warren Buffett was. The caller didn't know who he was.

There was a huge break between callers. Jolly said he guessed it was because his audience felt challenged, but in this day of technology -- what, with the iPod's and the Internet and everything -- people no longer thought about people. It was very introspective.

Another caller said he thought John McCain was the most fascinating person in the world. Then Jolly asked him who he thought was the second most fascinating.

"I... you know, this isn't a question you ponder all the time."

"How about Warren Buffett? How fascinating do you find him?"
**********

The next night, Jolly returned to talking about sports. His subject was the upcoming NBA Draft. I decided to chime in.

"I think the Sixers are in a good position, Jolly, with all their draft picks. But they have to be careful with them. Let me use a metaphor. In 1978, my father purchased a rare, jewel-encrusted Faberge egg for $2,000. Today, that same Faberge egg costs $48,000."

"What are you talking about?"

"You have to look at the draft like a growth stock. I think the Sixers should go after Jared Jordan from Marist."

Jolly then hung up on me and called me a moron.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

jolly is a moron

10:35 AM  
Blogger Jamar said...

Ha! The faberge egg line gets em every time.

10:30 PM  

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